For the first time in my life, I felt real fear. That stomach churning, lump-in-your-throat feeling that induces desperation. Alone, I felt death would find me where no-one else could.
After the cave-in it was darker than I had ever imagined possible. I was laying on the floor of the cave, my feet and lower legs pinned beneath the rubble of fallen rocks and dirt, and I was choking on the dust that still sifted from the unsteady roof. I was still groggy from the rock which had struck me on the head, and memories of my wife and children were clogging my muddled thoughts.
"Be careful. I love you," were my wife's words as I left that morning. My two boys: Davy and Darren, had been raking the front yard as I had backed out of the driveway. They stopped long enough to wave but started a playful leaf fight as I waved good-bye. When I drove away that day I never thought this could be the last time I would see them.
The memory of their laughter was still clear in my mind but I needed to focus on the problem at hand. I leaned over on one hip to retrieve my handkerchief, realizing it would help me breathe. Tying the white cloth so it covered my nose and mouth, I began taking slow deliberate breaths. Then I remembered the flashlight I had in my backpack. I thought about freeing my legs, but decided to retrieve the flashlight first so I could see what I was doing. As I moved around, removing the pack from my back, I realized my legs didn't hurt, they were Just pinned. I groped through the pack in the darkness, my fingers finally stumbling over the familiar form of the flashlight. As I flicked the switch, glorious light spilled over the top of the pack, inspiring a little hope where there was only fear before.
"I love you flashlight," came out of my mouth as I held the instrument fondly in my hands. I don't remember feel such affection for batteries, but these, definitely held a bright spot in my heart. I aimed the light in the direction of my feet, and could see it wouldn't take much to free myself. By the time I moved enough rubble to pull myself loose, the dust had quit falling from the ceiling and breathing became easier.
I gingerly got up, testing my feet and legs. Other than being bruised, I was unhurt and ready to find a way out of this damnable cave. Shining the light around, I found the back of the cave extended beyond the effectiveness of the light, so I decided to explore.
To my dismay, the cave extended about 30 feet and ended at a solid rock wall. I searched the ceiling for air-shafts, but there was none. It became clear at that point, the only way out, was the way I had come in.
My rock hunting hobby had really gotten me in trouble, I thought, as I started digging gently with my hands. The dirt was soft and moved easily, giving me time to reflect on the other things I could have, or maybe, should have been doing with this Saturday. I thought of my family at home, working and playing together without me, and tears welled in my eyes. Again the reality of my situation swelled within me and I began digging with more intensity. The increased movement of dirt also raised more dust into the stagnant air, forcing me to slow my pace but I continued at the task for about 30 minutes before stopping to rest.
The thought crossed my mind as I sat next to my backpack that I didn't fully remember it's contents. I used my resting time to take inventory. Propping the flashlight in the dirt, I removed the items, one-by-one: a roll of masking tape, a pencil, a small note pad, three nylon sacks with pull-sting openings, a snake-bite-kit, a roll of 1/4 inch rope, a box of matches, and a rock hammer.
"Damn, why didn't I bring the pack-shovel?" I said. My words echoed through the cave.
My fingers were already raw from digging and as I replaced the items, the thought occurred to me to tape a nylon bag on each hand to substitute for gloves.
"If I get out of here, I'll have an extra set of batteries," I vowed, and again my words echoed back to my ears. The sound was somehow reassuring and helped me fight the loneliness of my isolation, and I found myself talking out loud more as time progressed.
"Well, guess I'd better get back to work," I said.
I wiped a lingering tear from my cheek, grabbed the hammer and flashlight and crawled back up the sloping dirt. The hammer and make-shift gloves made the work more productive and before long, I had excavated a slender tunnel along the roof-line. I knew I had dug about six feet into the obstruction because my feet were now at the entrance. The tight fit of my-small tunnel was slowing my pace and also, making It hard to breath. My nose flared under the mask of the handkerchief, as I tried to strain the oxygen through the dust. My temper was also rising with my lack of progress. Five minutes was as long as I could stay in the tunnel, then I would have to back out, dragging the spoils with me. To make matters worse, the flashlight was getting dim. I turned the light off every time I backed out of the tunnel, saving the precious, hope-giving light as much as possible.
I had been trapped nearly three hours now, and at this point, the only important thing to me was surviving, and getting back to my family. My job, my hobbies nor my interests in financial gains were of any concern to me. I Just wanted to get home!
"I've got to be getting close," I said. "It can't be too much further. It Just can't."
I hyperventilated, then snaked my way to the end of the tunnel again. In the failing light, I chopped and dug at the wall before me, then I broke through.
"Thank God. Thank God Thank God!" I said as my head fell onto my out-stretched arm.
The light as well as the fresh air from outside struck me in the face as I widened the opening. Then I gently backed into the cave. I tied one end of the rope on the backpack and the other end on one of my belt loops. I took one last look around my former tomb, then wiggled my way to freedom, sliding down the blockage, head-first. As I stood, I pulled on the rope, rescuing my pack and it's contents.
I said many prayers of thanks on my 45-minute drive to the house. In that cave, I found a new understanding of the important things in life, and a renewed determination to make my house, a home of love, expressed each day to every member of my family. I also learned to stay out of caves!
